Holy crap. It's started.
The ugly...terrifying...inevitable descent into Uncool.
I thought I had a few years to go: My ringtone is Lady Gaga. I buy my jeans at Wet Seal. I Facebook, I Twitter, I Blog, I've even Skyped.
But, as with my own mother....it all starts.... with a song lyric.
Year: 1985
Song: "Heartache Tonight"
Artist: The Eagles
My mom: "....There's gonna be a party tonite, a party tonite-"
Me: "HEARTACHE!!!!!!!!"
My mom: "..heartache tonite, I know..."
Year: Present Day
Song: "Fifteen"
Artist: Taylor Swift
Me: "....and when you're - sixteen and-"
Tween: "FIFTEEN!!! God, Mom."
Me: "..fifteen and-somebody tells you they love you.."
Year: Present Day
Song: Love Story
Artist: Taylor Swift
Me: "...and I was cryin' in the bathroom, beggin-"
Tween: "CRYIN' ON THE STAIRCASE!!!!"
Me"...cryin' on the staircase, beggin' you please don't go.."
Year: Present Day
Song: My Immortal
Artist: Evanescence
Me: "...and I washed your - hands for all of-"
Tween: "Oh My GOD!!! HELD YOUR HAND!!!!!"
Me: "...held your hand for all of these years.."
Lame, party of one.
And just when I thought it couldn't get any worse....
She posts it on Facebook.
18 comments:
I've managed to avoid this pitfall of uncoolness by only exposing my child to songs I know and love from my youth. Her iPod's 80s playlist rivals mine (she's presently relaxing in the bathtub to the strains of the Cars' Greatest Hits). This way, Mommy doesn't mess up the lyrics and inadvertently display her utter lack of cool.
Then again, I've never bought jeans at Wet Seal, so perhaps I'm already exposed as uncool? *gulp*
I think I've known for a little while that my kids are rolling their eyes more than I care for. My mom was never "cool" so I don't know if there's any hope for me. Even with my MIA ringtone and Black Eyed Peas on my ipod.
I know how to handle this... lean down to your tween, whisper in her ear... "bring it!" Then simply post her baby pictures on your facebook and tag her in them...
When she dares to act mortified... just smile.
Of course this is coming from someone who was defriended by her 13 yr old.
awwwww! My son has (who is SEVEN) has discovered the word "weird" and now uses it to describe everything about me. sigh.
It happens to all of us sooner or later - those of us with children just have it pointed out to us prompty & often.
In youth we learn. In old age we understand.
I was cool one year of high school. I don't really know how it happened and it passed fairly quickly. Never really understood the science of coolness.
Welcome to old age and hearing loss.
Not to worry, when dementia kicks in you will be just as cool as ever.
i actually cried a little as i read this. the more i read, the more i laughed. until the tears came. so funny.
hahahahaa ground her. :)
ha-ha-ha...at least she didn't DENY you on facebook as my 3 boys have!
Sue you continue to crack me up.
Hold me closer Tony Danza.
Happy Friday, hope this cracks you up.
Topical considering the Gulf situation but does this not remind you of something out of Monty Python?
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8-QNAwUdHUQ
Yay ~ welcome back!!! At least you have a Facebook and are friends with your daughter! My sixteen year old has begged me not to get one... I'm way to uncool for that. And if I do get one, there's no way she wants to be friends with me. It's bad enough that all the adults at church are requesting her... her mom as her friend would just be too much for her to take ;) She's soooo cool!
Ouch. you ARE old! I just don't sing around the kids. They think it is awesome that I even know who these young musicians are:)
I guess it's only fair - we post all the cute and silly things they say on facebook, too.
I feel compelled to change the lyrics, so that I can sing my faves in front of my 5 and 7 year old daughters. Ever heard the Kings of Leon lyric "oooohhh, your SENSES on fire?" It's so funny when they sing along!
知道他有了外遇
面對他的低聲下氣妳冷嘲熱諷、無理取鬧
妳瘋狂似的大吵大鬧
甚至到他的公司去亂、向他的親友抱怨、向鄰居們哭訴…
妳把他的外遇鬧的人盡皆知
最後，妳把他的愧疚消耗殆盡…
最後，妳把他想要回頭的念頭打消…
最後，妳自己把他推向外遇的第三者身邊…
I'm sorry, but "washed your hands" just makes sense. Especially to a mom. Just like that song from our youth:
Last night I had the strangest dream
I sailed away to China
in a little rowboat to find ya
You said you had to get your laundry clean,
Didn't have no one to fold it...
What does that mean?
I love it! I have succumbed to this pitfall many times over. Yes, I remember the moments of correcting my own mother. Oh how time haunts us.
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