Thursday, December 3, 2009

Twitter Recap. Because Blogging Is Hard.







My recent tweets.

Think of them as *teeny tiny* blog posts.

I do.




Um, Tiger? You can marry the blondest, most Nordic-looking chick on the planet - but if you cheat, she will go ghetto on your ass.
8:45 PM December 3rd from Twhirl


Dear First Christmas Card To Arrive Person: All feelings of good cheer are negated by the fact that I now hate you.
4:30 PM December 3rd from Twhirl


My husband thinks the cleaning ladies are stealing his socks. Holding off on filing a report just yet.
3:05 PM December 2nd from Twhirl


9 year-old: "Ew. these grapes have nuts."
12:38 PM November 28th from Twhirl



Best part of Thanksgiving Parade? Big-headed pilgrims.
9:43 AM November 26th from Twhirl



New term from Twilight New Moon: "fursploded".
9:56 AM November 23rd from Twhirl



Just a pre-emptive strike: I'm over "Elfing Yourself."
10:25 AM November 13th from Twhirl


Here's a shocker: my husband has an idea of how I can thank him for serving in the Marines. (#veteransdayisnotaboutsex)
6:00 PM November 11th from Twhirl


Why isn't "beheaded" "de-headed"?
6:00 PM November 6th from Twhirl



Love watching the kids candy trade negotiations. it's like a NATO summit.
10:37 AM November 1st from Twhirl



My plan to not touch the Halloween candy is going really well since I haven't bought it yet.
9:36 AM October 30th from Twhirl


Going to start referring to my underwear as "unmentionables".
9:16 AM October 28th from Twhirl


Awesomely random: Just got an email that my blog is featured on Dog-Health-Problems.org.
6:33 PM October 27th from Twhirl



Latvian marketing co. admits to creating "meteor crater" to "boost interest" in the country. Get my travel agent on the phone.
4:21 PM October 26th from Twhirl


Me to 8 year-old: 'try these chick peas". Her: "No. They look like butts."
12:33 PM October 20th from Twhirl

15 comments:

Frau said...

Great recap and your right twitter is easier and randomness is expected!

♥ Kathy said...

LMAO

Have the sock thieves been apprehended yet?

Spot said...

Your tweets are funnier than my blogs. I. Give. Up. No, not really. But I do wonder how you pack so much funny into such a short form. It's a gift. Embrace it.

still giggling,
♥Spot

Michelle said...

LOL! Great tidbits.

Loukia said...

Hilarious tweets! Especially the grape and chick pea ones! Haha! Your kids are cute.

Dezzy Lou Where Are You said...

muahahah

jenn said...

"fursploded" = AWESOME. Love it.

Lisa-licious said...

Piss me right off! I forgot to put on WATERPROOF mascara, and now I have raccoon (also spelled "racoon"--I Googled!) eyes from laughing/crying! You really better start saving some of these nuggets for your book! I mean it!

You are so funny, girl! Respect!

Shelley said...

I have not seen New Moon yet. Please don't kick me out of the club. I'm waiting until my daughter gets here for Christmas, then we're going together.

Chick peas look like butts. HA.

Ann's Rants said...

This I can handle. I think I should just replace my blog entirely with my twitter feed.

Genius.

Amy@Bitchin'WivesClub said...

Excellent tweets.... I remembers seeing some of them, but am glad to get the best collated and set before me.

And thanks to Marinka, who tweeted the link to your post. ;)

Kristie said...

These are hilarious! My favorite is the veterns day tweet...

Keyona said...

How do I manage to miss these AWESOME tweets.

choochoo said...

did you ever solve the sock-mystery? Maybe the latvians stole it to use in their fake meteor crater...

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