Tuesday, November 15, 2011

Amazon So Doesn't Care About My Writer's Block

Holy mother.

I TOTALLY forgot my blog was available on Kindle and Amazon was CHARGING .99 cents for it.

Apparently, they've been sending out apology emails to subscribers and offering them their money back. And booted me out of the Amazon Kindle family of offerings.


But guess what. I got a job. (!!!!!!!)  I know. I'm totally an executive right now. No, I'm not...but I wear heels and lipgloss and curse at people while I'm driving. So same thing.

Here's what I've learned my first week:

Things to Say When You're Getting Coffee to-go in the Morning at the Wawa:

"Another day, another dollar.."

"Is it Friday yet? hahahahaha"

"Workin' hard? Or hardly workin'?"

"Take this job and shove it - Am I right?"

"Are you gonna finish that pretzel?"

Things That Have Not Changed Since I Last Worked in 1997

Adding smiley faces or hearts to your "possession labels" in the office fridge so you don't seem like a selfish OCD bitch.

Minimum of 6 trial-and-error passes to figure out a double sided copy.

Do we, or do we not, get Columbus Day off.

Things I Have No Time For Now That I Work


Visiting my own Facebook page

Anybody else's laundry besides mine

Front step decoration and maintenance:

"Back off, I'm workin' for The Man."