Sunday, September 14, 2008

EVEN MORE Words I Made Up


(Is it time for a book yet?)


Philidelflip (fil-a-del'-flip) n.
The uncanny ability of a half bagel with cream cheese to land "cream cheese-down" when it falls.


wavetraction (wave-trak'-shun) n.
When you try to wave at someone you know in public and they don't see you, but everyone else does, so you have to retract your wave.


vegivindication (vej-ee-vin-di-kay'-shun)n.
Because of the "first-in, last-out" nature of grocery shopping, finally proving to the checkout clerk with the last items on the belt that you do, in fact, feed your family healthy produce, not just crap.


bumperclump (bum'-per-clump) n.
A frantic gridlock of bumper cars that can't get out of each others' way and use up all the ride time.


beefizzwary (bee-fizz'-ware-ee) adj.
To have a phobia of a bee being in your soda can.


ghostcrank (gowst'-crank) n.
The unexplainable phenomenon of your car stereo being several decibels louder when you start the car up than when you left it.



42 comments:

Heather said...

Once again, LOL. Actually, more like Chuckle-chuckle-snort-COUGH-COUGH-GASP-chuckle-COUGH until Hubby looks over, mildly concerned, to see if I'm okay.

Stupid cold with its stupid congestion, can't even laugh right at blog post hilarity.

And yes, it is TOTALLY time for a book. Absolutely!

scargosun said...

BAAAAWAAAHHH HAAAAA!

I LOVE it!

Patrice said...

lol yes I would say it's definitely time for a book! I would read it...

My new goal in life is to work one of these words into a paper and pull it off! haha It will be like my own personal Happy Hour Sue tribute!

Leah said...

I am SO beefizzwary. I've seen two people get stung on the lip from sodabees. It's not pretty.

Kids, Canines, and Chaos said...

I'm a total fan of the vegivindication. I'm always feeling like the cashier is judging my food choices! I agree with Heather, my hubby always questions my reading when I laugh out loud at the computer! :) So glad I found you through a friend of a friend!

The Mom Jen said...

I'll totally buy your book! If you buy my K-Lish! ;)

BacktoBarnwell said...

yeah i would buy your book...under the condition I get some shout outs written in to it, and am listed under the Acknowledgements section ;-0

Simply Shannon said...

I may have to start using a few of those. Very amusing.

jill jill bo bill said...

Hey, that radio thing is me. But I'll quit. dammit

Jen said...

I love this series. It cracks me up. I especially like the last one, that happens to me all the time.

Brittany said...

My fear of bees in my beer cans border lines obsessive!

Ali said...

Wavetraction and ghostcrank. Awesome. And so very, very true!

A New Yorker said...

Ghostcrank, now that I know is real!

Tonya Staab said...

BWAHAHAHAHAAA. Now I finally have a word for the checkout and for that embarassing wave that everyone but the correct person sees.

amelia bedelia said...

you need to start your own dictionary, webster!

oº˚ Homeschool Mom˚ºo said...

ghostcrank yes that would be me! Love your site and would so buy your book! Much Love!

McMommy said...

The grocery store one!!!! Were you behind me in line today?!?!?!

Swirl Girl said...

To go along with vegevindication...

you might say 'vegevindication by proxy' would the smooshed and damamged condition your veggies are in when you get home...why the 12 pack of soda is always on top of the grapes and peaches....vengeful bag boy or marketing ploy?

Lipstick said...

I love Ghostcrank!!! You are just so funny Happy Hour Sue!

Miss Lisa said...

I agree--we need a book!
I admit sometimes I get more greens for vegivindication!

Tenakim said...

There has to be a publisher somewhere, here!

I'm even learning- I had no idea people were afraid of bees in soda cans!

Chat Blanc said...

ghostcrank!! I knew there was a name for it! ;)

Anonymous said...

My phobia is birds. Eating outside, they always find me and accost me. I f-cking hate them. My nonword is equivolate. Big non-words throw my kid off his game, and he'll usually retreat. When I'm answering emails or on the phone, he invariably pounces. Can I have some pie, can I eat cookies, can I watch tv, can I jump off the balcony? Ask me later, son. Right now I'm equivolating.

Sharon said...

Once I had a drink with a straw in the car, got out to run a quick errand, got back in the car and sipped a fly. Can you give me a word for that? Besides the obvious gag, blah, yuck?

The Microblogologist said...

My mother is extremely beefizzwary! My sister got stung on the lip when one went in her soda and she didn't know, that has only made Mom more neurotic unfortunately. And I agree with everyone else, you should write a dictionary, it would make a very good reference text...

Karen

t said...

vegivindication----and I thought I was the only one who did the big veggie fake out! Typically there is a vegan or at least someone healthier than I am in front of me AND in back of me. I try to hide the twenty gallons of chocolate ice cream and bulk pack of Doritos under the spinach...which, amazingly, I eat. If someone glances at my pile of crap food, I usually say "Big party this weekend".

Then again...I'll live til I am 90...I do believe a healthy does of junk food is good for you.

Unknown said...

These are great! I was waiting patiently for the next batch to come out and my wishes have been answered.

Jennifer said...

I am beefizzwary in a big way!

Love your made-up words--you definitely need to write a book!

Mama Dawg said...

vegivindication is my fav one. I just went shopping yesterday and did this.

Beth Cotell said...

Sue! Once again, you've done it!
These are all spot on!

Wavetraction...there is no way to gracefully pull off a wavetraction. I've looked like a fool many, many times trying to retract a wave.

Shelley said...

I always visit the produce section last, in the name of vegivindication. That way, all my crap is covered up by healthy-looking stuff as I proceed to the checkout. And then my fruits and vegetables are first on the conveyor belt. Meaning the cashier will pay no attention whatsoever to the Oreos, pizza rolls, and ice cream.

TentCamper said...

I totally have beefizzwary. I have to look into my can and shake it around when I am outside.

Damn I look like a fool.

Anonymous said...

Your words are hilarious. I would buy your book and then use the words in general conversation!

Rachel said...

I love your made up words...and the bathtub gangsta!! I found your blog on Stephanie's blog (Live Laugh Love)...too funny! I'll be back!

Anonymous said...

I love your made up words.


peace
#2

Linda S said...

My daughter and I loved this...no she's not a regular reader, but she is mildly attracted to BG...

Can't wait for the book...

Jenni said...

LOL! These are always so good!

I am a daily victim of the ghostcrank!

Lisa-licious said...

"comicalamity"...when you laugh so hard at one of Sue's Happy Hour posts that you accidently spill your Kahlua! ARGH!!!! You are a genius, my blogger idol, and I will buy lots of your books for presents if you write one...

Aubrey said...

I think it's time for that book! I'd be first in line to buy. Wavetraction cracked me up!!

Practically Joe said...

Ghostcrank happens quite often while watching TV ... especially when a show goes to commercial ... I hate those ghostcranking ads.

Unknown said...

Good stuff - I may have to use a few of those!

Julie D said...

I think you need to write a book. Seriously.

I'm still not over "debeautiflate".