Tuesday, July 22, 2008

The Mind of a Guard Poodle

0800 hours: Large, strange male in backyard. Huh. 
I want toast.



 
0900 hours: What the-???!!!!!!!!!!Holy Crap!



OhOhNoOhNoNoNoNo
...It Can't Be - Don't Panic. SweetJesus It's a 
SQUIRREL!!!!!!



SQUIRREL!!!!!!God In Heaven! Get the Children!!!! SQUIRREL!!!!!Back up!!! I need Back Up!!!!!




Are You Listening to me?!!!??!!!!SQUIRREL!!



Why aren't you panicking.

34 comments:

Wendy said...

Ha! Just like my house, only with all the curly fur.

I get that stare all the time -- why aren't you listening to me?! I'm trying to save you people!

Holy Crappers said...

Rosie is a big watcher of squirrels, one of these days she's gonna get herself one

#1

Jen said...

Oh my stars that is the funniest thing ever. I love it. ROFL!!!!

Kelly said...

haha thats funny. My greyhound isn't a watch/guard dog at all. If someone would ever break in, she would smile at them and maybe eat whatever they may happen to drop..hopefully for her excitement it would be a Lego, her current favorite..haha

Jonny's Mommy said...

That's not funny. What are you making fun?

Squirrels are dangerous OK?

Man.

-- Jonny Mommy's Wonder Dog "Copper"

Ann said...

I love it!
I can totally relate.
God forbid a fly should be in house.
Hold onto the lamps and vases!!!

Heather said...

My mother has, since before I was born, kept poodles. It started with one toy poodle pup my dad brought her as a present (in his overcoat pocket, awwww) when they were newlyweds, and within a few years, the minimum became two standard poodles, always female, usually black. The most Mom ever had was four (two black, two white) and now she's down to the two white ones. They're sisters and share the same brain cell. This cell is triggered to fire whenever a leaf blows by in the driveway, but not when masked and armed giants bust through the door or window.

I just don't get poodles. Only one of them - out of the more than a dozen Mom's had over the years (Dad won't claim any connection to them, he just puts up with them sharing his home) - has been noticeably intelligent.

That smart one would be the one I tried to teach to read, back when I was five. But that's another story.....

At least your poodle doesn't have the poofs. Mom always does the head, tail and ankle poofs. Reeeediculous.

Tiffany said...

Aww he's cute! Gigantic but cute. My weenie dog loves to chase squirrels. She caught one once and it was the same size as her. Now my bulldog only cares about chasing bugs or anything involving food. LOL

Keeper Of All Things said...

Always the squirrels.........
Don't trust 'em
they got beady eyes

Hup said...

hahaha...my friends dogs go CRAZY, too. I always freak out a bit because they go NUTS, but it's always just a squirrel. Always just a squirrel.

Pretty damn funny each time though. :)

Pleasing Procrasinator said...

LOL..Just like my house except my dog wants the neighbors cat in a real bad way.

Kathy said...

Hilarious! Love this: "I want toast." Oh, my dear. You make me laugh so.

Blarney said...

Mine loves to alert us to deer in the back yard ... never mind she's only 12 lbs soaking wet.
Thanks for stopping in yesterday! Have a great day!

April said...

this has got to be the cutest post ever! lol

Leslie said...

LMAO, that was great! We used to have a poodle. She was a great dog. Me thinks I need a dog. Then I really will need some Valium.

Diesel said...

That actually made me LOL. I admire your commitment to the idea.

amelia bedelia said...

Thank God, you didn't open the door and let the squirrel in, like my Mother did, yes, the damn thing ended up in her dining room, on her drapes for about 4 hours...

McMommy said...

Odd...my children act the same way when they see a squirrel....

Lynette said...

what IS it with dogs & squirrels? LOL

Debbie said...

Oh I am...Sorry Sue, I don't like dogs...and I really don't like big dogs...and I just spent two years kidding rid of those friggin' rodents called squirrels that made themselves comfy in my attic.

wehave9 said...

Too funny! I am laughing my butt off or I at least hope it is helping. Cute dog!

cat said...

My goodness, this is beyond cute. LOL!

Meg said...

Like at my house only my lab has a nervous sneeze when excited.

ali said...

My huskies are getting way too used to squirrels eating my birdseed. I need a poodle!

Debbie said...

I just came over to tell you how to see my bling and then re-read my comment. Surely I was bleary eyed after catching up on all my "work" this morning as I meant to say I have spent the last two years GETTING rid of rodents...not kidding...Ha...what a kidder...

Anyway, just re-save my blog to your favorites and the icon will show up next to my blog title or URL in your browser. I was totally thinking martini glass blogicon for you...yup...totally...

OH and I drive a Tahoe...crying at the pump weekly...

Bex said...

bwahahahahaaaaaa!!!

sinisterdan said...

My daughter does that when she sees chicken nuggets.

Mama2hre said...

Ha! Thanks for the laugh! We have a dog who is great with people, but feels the need to kill everyother living thing that enters our yard. That's right, let the strange people in and protect us from the baby bunnies and squirrles! I feel so much safer!

Brittany said...

I think he should be drafted by homeland security!

Rochelle said...

I love it. I'll have to steal your idea and post my dog's "Deep Basset Thoughts" some day. Really, he does have deep thoughts when he isn't snoring!

Thanks for the laugh.

jaime said...

what's funny is that my son does the same thing! wait. that's kinda scary huh? lol!

Queen Goob said...

Not only did I read this out loud, but I read it out loud in the goofy Standard Poodle voice. Come on, you know the one....LOL

Val said...

Great! Only I have a child who is running the other way from a squirrel!

TONYA said...

LMAO. That is too funny. Mine has yet to spot a squirrel but put her in a room with a fly or a grasshopper and she about loses her mind with excitement.