Tuesday, January 27, 2009

Fat?

This makes me mental.

Fox News is running this photo of Jessica Simpson today with the headline:

"Jessica Simpson Shocks Fans With Fuller Figure!"

OK. First, why am I reading Fox News. The answer to that is twofold.

Number one, I need to be on top of any and all terror threats.

Number two, CNN probably won't report on the woman who gave birth into her sweatpants, which is probably my favorite Fox news story of all time.

But back to Jessica. Perez Hilton claims: "Jess got fat!" Is this fat? Really? You're going to show this to someone who doesn't know celebrities and ask them what they think and they're gonna say "I don't know- it's some fat girl"???????







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Look- the high-waisted jean is really not meant for us curvy girls, for sure. When you have big boobs, you don't want to shorten the distance between waistband and underwire.

But it's just a poor fashion choice, people.

It's not like she caught the Fat Virus . (!) Did you read about this yesterday?????

Scientists are claiming you can "catch" fatness the same way you catch a cold. Bizarre, but I'm all for new excuses.

I'm not eating too much.... Someone sneezed on me.

63 comments:

McMommy said...

She is not fat. She just needs a new stylist. Those jeans...that belt...I'm going to be ill!!!

Briya said...

Really, though. I don't think the high waisted pant is for ANYBODY...LOL.

Shieldmaiden96 said...

I should be so fat.

Anonymous said...

I agree. It's those pants! I saw her in concert a couple of weeks ago. (She opened for the band I was there to see.) I thought she looked really good ... far, far, far from fat. Now her singing was a different thing altogether ... far, far, far from good.

Caroline said...

Jessica fat!? Sure, she gained a few, but now she is normal!! Hollywood is a weird place where you are fat at 100 lbs! Anyway, I have to admit...the outfit...hideous! The 2 leopard belts and Mom jeans...ugh!

I am curious...how is her career going if she is resorting to singing at Chili cookoff's in Tampa? Time for a new agent (and stylist)!

sheilah said...

I would kill to be fat like that.

Sheesh! She has the figure of a woman not an anorexic little teenager!

The Mom Jen said...

All I can say is MOOOOO, MOOOO MMMOOOOOOO!

Judy Schwartz Haley | CoffeeJitters.Net said...

of course according to Fox our current president is our biggest terror threat, no need to worry about anything else...

as far as the blonde is concerned I really don't care how much she weighs, but she should probably fire her stylist. that was a seriously bad fashion choice.

Creative-Type Dad said...

So that must be the virus I got on the recent cruise.

Happy to know it wasn't because I ate like a pig.

Elizabeth said...

I suppose it would depend on who they are comparing her to...if it's the Olsen twins, yes she seems a bit thick. If it's Carnie Wilson, she's normal weight.
However, no woman should be wearing those jeans. Not flattering at all!

Marinka said...

She's not fat. But for reasons that I've never been able to understand, she looks like a 40something year old woman from Palm Beach.

Anonymous said...

It's not that she is fat...Hello she looks great and healthy. It's just a really bad choice in clothing!

Lori said...

What is up to, an actual size 8 now? Good grief!

Tiffany said...

Have you seen her pics on AOL? Because I totally think they are distorted. She looks worse there than on these pics.

And I have that virus. It's terrible. I've had it for 10 years now. Will there ever be a cure???

michelle said...

Showed this picture to my 8th graders. Even adolescent girls think that she is gorgeous, thin, and poorly dressed. Must be a slow news day is this is the best they can come up with.

Rachel said...

Crazy; gotta love the media...including all news stations...I feel bad for our young girls who think they have to be unhealthy and skinny to be told they are not fat!

Julie H said...

I thought the same thing when I read that on Perez. He's quick to judge who is too fat or too skinny and I think there is a very fine line between the 2 in his eyes!

Tenakim said...

A freakin MEN! Unflattering pants is one thing- calling her fat is sending the wrong message to my girls that will inevitably be suffering from eating disorders in the next 5 years if I don't stand up!

I'm sure it's a crock of shit, but I like the idea of an excuse of why I'm getting fat- I caught it (yeah, I caught it from not going to the gym in months and eating every cookie and cake put in front of my face in the last two months!)

just bob said...

I wouldn't kick her out of my house.

Krystyn @ Really, Are You Serious? said...

Ummm...ugly jeans, but not fat.

She just needs a new stylist. The pants, that belt...and maybe a new bra!

Mary@Holy Mackerel said...

Anything over a Size minus-10 is considered fat now...Those pants have to go, though.

Jen said...

this makes me CRAZY and now I am depressed so I need a candy bar, maybe 2.

Unknown said...

I agree, those jeans are horrendous but if she's fat... I'm in BIIIIG trouble...

Swirl Girl said...

If she's fat...I am the whole virus.

sorry for the spread.

Meg said...

Personally, I can't wait till she pops a few babies out.

BacktoBarnwell said...

Um, I was late as usual to the Rascal Flatts concert so I missed her all of 20 minute opening, but damn those jeans are making her look like a pimp's ho.

As for the ass in the fat virus article...homefry needs to stay away from the Ryan's and Golden Corals. Fat VIRus???Seriously though??? That's about as probable as Denis Gerwing committing suicide...

Jen said...

1. She is not fat.

2. That outfit is hideous. No one should be allowed to wear high-waist jeans. EVER!!

3. She may have gained a few pounds, but I think it makes her look more attractive. Still NOT FAT!!

4. Fox News cracks me up.

Candice said...

What a lard ass!! She's clearly been eating too much Tony Romo.. I mean Tony Roma's.

I kid.

She's certainly not fat, but a little fuller than usual. But in Hollywood? We're talkin' clinically obese compared to the rail thin anorexic actresses.

I wonder if Papa Simpson will be commenting on her fuller hips like he used to talk about her boobs. Weird!

Jen said...

Oh and I almost forgot:

5. I think I got the fat virus. Is there a cure that doesn't involve diet or exercise?

Miss Yvonne said...

I heard someone on the radio this morning say she is now in "plus size sizes". Seriously? Cause I wear plus sizes and I sure as heck don't look anything like Jessica Simpson.

Unknown said...

geesh what is this world coming to?
If I only looked like that...must be a slow news day

Aria said...

I want to be fat like that... even if it means that Fox News (patewey) would talk about me.

Aria said...

...ps... the high waisted pants are only for those who don't even need bras when they sneeze... they are the only people alive that can possibly wear them.. this is why people fell for this fashion abomination in the first place ~ models have no tits.

Anonymous said...
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Unknown said...

McMommy nailed it. New stylist. But truly I was more distracted by her ultra wavy hair. Even more than her big fat crotch. :-)

Cameron said...

I'd do her :)

KSK said...

Jeans are hid.e.ous. but, really I am stuck on the preceding mention of woman-giving-birth-into-sweat-pants. NEED to read this first hand and am beginning google search Now!

Deb said...

aha! I must have that germ too.

Jenni said...

I think she looks good! But those jeans are a fashion DON'T! There should be a black bar over her eyes...

amelia bedelia said...

I wish I was "fat" like Jessica!

Jennifer said...

I wish I were that fat...

roy/elisabeth dean said...

The next we hear of Jessica Simpson is that she has lost down to 90 lbs and looks "fabulous"!
Surely she has mirrors in her mansion~ looks like she would use them! WE do! And we don't have stylists dressing us!

♥ Lilly

Liz said...

She is NOTTTTTTTTTTTT fat. She looks darling in those pictures! I'd kill to be "that" fat!

The Golf Widow said...

I wish that was the fat I'm trying to lose. If she would lose the waist at her chest she would look better, but hello, I'd take it.

Peterson Party of 5 said...

Oh please... if she is fat then lord help us mommas that are size 12+

Shelley said...

Miss Yvonne - That's because in Hollywood, anything over 4 is a plus size. I want to be fat like Jessica. Girl's got her curves on. Betcha BG would hit that.

I think I feel a virus coming on...

Anonymous said...

Well if she's fat, then I guess they are going to have to call the paramedics on me in the morning to help me get out of bed. Maybe they can saw through my walls and roll me into my son's room when he's ready to get up. As for what happens the rest of the day? I guess I'll just go lay back in bed.

tamilyn said...

Why can't celebrities dress themselves. Didn't they sit and make fun of celebrities before they became famous? Hello-those pants shouldn't even be sold. It is a crime. And if you are taking a picture below the subject, of course they will look bigger. I must have sat in a pile of snot to catch the fat I've got........

Cathie said...

I caught the fat virus around 1977....

Unknown said...

So how long does the fat virus last?

Dawn Parsons Smith said...

High waisted jeans??? Eewwww...

I caught that darn virus right after my first kid...

Dreyer Drama said...

Well I wish I were as "fat" as Jessica Simpson. I will say the pants she is wearing are not very flattering.

Aubrey said...

I saw this pick and didn't even notice the weight. The hideous ensemble caught my eye!

Heather said...

If she's fat, there's no hope for me. I should just go to the Fat Farm and get it over with.

Even with the poor fashion choice, she does NOT look fat.

Stupid media. I hate Fox News especially.

Colleen - Mommy Always Wins said...

Uh, yeah...what the HELL was she thinking with those 80s jeans? I wonder if the bottoms were rolled up?

Noob Mommy said...

Wow.. just surfed that link to the Fat Virus story. I just feel bad for whoever had their butt picture taken. What bad class! It was a total sneak attack.

nikkicrumpet said...

Well hell...if that's fat...SIGN ME UP!!!!

The 4-Crows Blog said...

I'd like to be a size 8 "fatty"......

jill jill bo bill said...

Alright, who infected me? I want names, people!!!

Anonymous said...

Shouldn't you be curing the fat virus, Dr. McFoxy? :)

Petra a.k.a The Wise (*Young*) Mommy said...

When I heard this, I nearly threw up. She is so not fat it is not even funny, but yes, that outfit is completely UN-flattering.

If that is fat, then I obviously need gastric bypass STAT.

SweetPeaSurry said...

lmao @ Fat Virus. I caught that bug a while ago!!!

CMP said...

poor fashion choice indeed. bad camera angle too........... WTH?